Hello,
I saw the screenshots you attached.
1) Sorry but it is not possible to display multiple attributes as swatches.
2) Sorry but the Customizations you mentioned will require core files customizations and this is beyond our limitations and support policy.
3) Sorry but it is not possible to make the changes you require. Please enter the variation that is out of stock and disable it. Unfortunately, by default Woocommerce does not provide the option to disable a variation automatically.
Regards.
Xtemos Studios.